I haven't been doing a lot of writing as of late. For some reason when I'm inside my own head an obnoxious amount, I only write as a last resort. Which as someone who wants to write books, that really shouldn't be a habit I choose to keep around in my life. Whereas breathing, I'll keep breathing on the 'good habit' list. Inner turmoil is a frequent flyer these days. Mainly pertaining to friends, but also in the 'Dad' context. I label myself as an over-thinker (or maybe other people have and I've just admitted defeat and adopted it at their urging) and as such relationships are at the front and center at my mind most of the time. Old friends, new friends and in-between, they all have had thought devoted to them at one time or another. These days I am confronting myself with the very real complications of keeping friends, strengthening relationships, letting relationships do as they will, or dropping them all together. 

One example of a friendship that has been let 'do as it do' is mine and Cris to the Ten's friendship. [shout out yo! you're beast] and you know what...it made it. It made it through new friends and new loves, and moves and different countries! And that...well of course that's God. I didn't work at the friendship, but as friends we love each other, and we both know that. We know that we have multiple past times of walking to 7-11 and bonding behind us, and for some reason...we made it. We're still friends. Why am I typing all this? I feel like friendships take work. Maybe I just like being proactive, even though I can never stay proactive for too long. I pretty much just get really intense and then burn out like a firework. 

So I guess my food for thought [for me, not you guys. Get your own food for thought, go to Food Lion or Giant or something! greedy.] is: Should I let it be? And by 'it' clearly I mean a few of my friendships that are changing [for the good! and maybe not so good. but lets not call it that; let's call it 'different'].

Anyways at the end of the day...I love all my friends. Or else I wouldn't choose to call them friends. And they're all awesome...I think it's time for some photos! (For some reason I've started calling pictures 'photographias' in my head, with a full on Spanish voice and everything. It's odd. Ole!)

Cris to the Ten.
7/3/2010 04:58:26 am

We definitely do have a 'do as they will' friendship. But at the same time...you and I have been through a lot. We did (and probably always will at random times) have to work at being friends. We've had to break down walls and build bridges. As you said 'that's God'. God is the only reason why we're able to keep it together. He's the one that brought us difficult times so that we could work through them in the end giving us a stronger friendship. One that obviously knows no bounds seeing that we live in different places now but yet can be completely open to each other at any given moment. So i think in a way...we don't have to necessarily strengthen our friendship or make an effort to keep it because we already went through all of that. We have a deep connection and now we can just...be. Be there for each other when needed and so on or just be there to have fun and enjoy each other's company. This might only make sense in my head and my head only. Not sure. haha

7/3/2010 05:15:17 am

So true dude. this totally made sense outside of your head! namely...in mine. hahaha. you're right, the key seems to be love. love that God has given and strengthened within us. we don't have to doubt that, so space and time [hahaha, so dramatic sounding, where really all I mean is we're far away and sometimes we don't talk a ton] don't really effect our friendship. i think thats a big thing with me...getting to the point where I KNOW in my heart, truly, that that love is there [in other friendships]. but that takes...time? who knows! we'll see.


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