A few weeks ago I was lying outside in my yard on the grass because I wanted to talk to God, get out of my house, and frankly I remember it being fun when I was a kid. Turns out, still fun! And even better, we have a butterfly bush, which is basically a bush that attracts a lot of butterflies. Not great for concentration, but beastly for causing joy in God's creation.

I was kneeling next to these flowers, feeling like an awe struck 6 year old, and I remember my heart whispering to God "Oh Lord, these are so beautiful. I wonder if they know how beautiful they are...and I wonder what it would be like to BE so beautiful." And that, that invited His spirit in. I know it might sound crazy to some of you, but I'm sure others of you have felt the same awe of the sky, or the ocean, or even seeing pure love in someone's eyes, and just feeling God right there next to you. And sometimes I'm just so aware of how beautiful the world is, and how God made it, and you know...He really appreciates us appreciating Him. And with all of that came this feeling of God answering back "You should feel like that. YOU are beautiful, and I should know, because I made you that way."

I feel like we spend so much time searching for someone to affirm us, either in our beauty or abilities, or just worth. But what if we saw ourselves as butterflies? God's creations flying around, absolutely beautiful. 

Thinking about it makes me not angry anymore at the person who tried to cut me off on the road today. And at the stupid things people sometimes say. To be a butterfly and not even realize it...well that's a pretty sad thing.

PS. Maybe this didn't make any sense. Maybe I'll come back to it later and try to fix it up. But I enjoy just free writing, and worrying about the rest later. 

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